Smartphone apps are great, we can use them to manage our social media, edit pictures, check the news and even order our next takeout. However, not all apps are quite as useful as this, in fact, some apps are laughably bad.
These are the apps we’ve decided to take a look at today, ones with awful ideas behind them, or which have the potential to break the phone that’s cost you so much money. So prepare yourself for our collection of the worst mobile apps ever!
So, you’ve just paid over £500 for a brand new iPhone 6 or whatever flagship handset you fancy. What’s the one thing you wouldn’t want to do with it? How about downloading the Hangtime app, which measures how high you can throw your phone into the air? Probably not the best idea…
The app itself says you should put it in your pocket and jump to see how long you can stay in the air for. However, the picture clearly shows a phone hurtling through the air, so it doesn’t give off the best impression if you ask us. Plus, the company behind it has the gall to charge you 69p for this pleasure!
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So little Timmy is crying his head off on the bus, wait a minute! Why not grab the Cry Translator app to find exactly what ailment is bothering your toddler? I don’t know, maybe because it’s completely inept at diagnosing any problems and costs the best part of three quid!
Serving as a one in five lottery, this app can apparently tell you whether your child is hungry, tired, bored, needs changing or wants its dummy. Simply put, it’s a guessing game which is wrong 80% of the time.
Ever wanted to see that lovely warm glow of a cigarette lighter, without the inherent risk of accidental burns? Well maybe the Virtual Lighter is for you!
Hopefully, you’ve read our sarcasm in that statement, as the Virtual Lighter is arguably one of the most pointless apps ever created. Offering nothing but a lighter to look at, none of the practical uses translate through the app itself. Luckily, it is free to use, so at least you won’t be burning any of your hard earned cash with it!
So, you’ve become a successful entrepreneur, you’ve earned more than enough cash to support yourself for life, what’s the app which really speaks out to you? I am Rich is the app you want!
Originally costing a sweet £700 in the app store, I am Rich does nothing but show you a shiny picture of a ruby, nothing else. Considering the economic crisis gripping the globe at the time, this probably wasn’t the best idea. Now though, you can grab the I am Rich app for free, which pretty much defeats the awful point it was originally making. Irony at its finest!
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We’ve all been there, maybe you went on an ill-advised night out the day before, or next door’s dog decided to serenade you overnight with a never-ending supply of barks and snarls, either way, you’re at work, and sleepy.
The [email protected] apps is the apparent ‘solution’ here, most probably because it will get you fired, hence you’ll never be tired at work again! It works by letting you catch 40 winks whilst it blurts out the common office noises like paper shuffling and keyboard tapping, and then gives you an alarm when you set it to wake you up. It’s free to download, but may cost you your job if you try and use it.
That’s right; there was an app out there which was a simulated stapler. No, that isn’t a typo, an actual stapler simulator app was available for you smartphone.
Of course, all the app could do was pretend to staple stuff together, as we’re yet to encounter a smartphone with a stapler attachment. If you can think of something to simulate through an app which is as boring as this then please, whatever you do, don’t stick it on the app store. Thankfully this is no longer with us, probably because it was incredibly pointless…
Written by Luke Hatfield